Author Archives: Joy Tiz

Four Legs Good, Two Legs Bad!

By Joy Tiz | Published: May 21, 2012
Every time I hear the occupiers or the president bleating on about “fairness”, I can’t help but remember that old mantra from George Orwell’s Animal House.  “Four legs good, two legs bad” the animals would chant over and over as they inadvertently mapped out their own demise in service of “fairness” and the greater good. [...]
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First Gay President’s Cigar Explodes

By Joy Tiz | Published: May 14, 2012
The House of Exploding Cigars finally fired one that would create collateral damage, unlike their previous run of self destructos.  Last week, the President of the United States made the entirely toothless statement that he had “evolved” into a pro gay marriage position. The only correct response to this announcement was:  so what?  Where are the [...]
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Obama Swiftboats Himself

By Joy Tiz | Published: April 30, 2012
It’s another gosh, I wish I’d said that moment, but credit goes to Mark Steyn  for pointing out that Team O keeps lighting exploding cigars for itself.  The always unflinching Toby Harnden found the remnants of the latest cigar bomb by talking to former and currently serving Navy SEALS who are livid at our naked [...]
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Party Like It’s 2012

By Joy Tiz | Published: April 23, 2012
It’s not 2008 anymore, though you wouldn’t know it listening to the doomsayers.  I already explained how Obama got himself  into the White House in Obamanutz:  a Cult Leader Takes the White House.  The same country who just couldn’t live without him has had quite enough of him now.  And candidate Obama himself is unraveling.  [...]
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SAHM Missile Launch a Stunning Success

By Joy Tiz | Published: April 16, 2012
The Romney Army was finally able to fire its elegant and powerful SAHM missile the other day in retaliation for a weak, North Korean style attack by a heretofore unknown Obama operative.  The SAHM missile performed magnificently, leaving tremendous wreckage in its wake. Some unknown writer or pundit or something named Hillary Rosen was used [...]
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Mitt Saved Lives–Who Knew?

By Joy Tiz | Published: April 10, 2012
If character matters again, conservatives can take some time out from grousing about being stuck with Romney as their candidate and spend a little time doing a some vetting on their own.  Who knew, for example, that back in 2003, Mitt Romney saved a family and their dog from drowning?   Read more...
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Somewhere Breitbart is Smiling

By Joy Tiz | Published: April 9, 2012
James O’Keefe, protege of the late Andrew Breitbart cooked up his most hilarious sting to date.  O’Keefe, in disguise, showed up at a DC polling place claiming to be Eric Holder.  You remember him, the attorney general who is adamantly opposed to requiring a photo ID of any sort for voters. The poll workers couldn’t [...]
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Obama’s Got Israel’s Back: Thats Where the Knife Goes

By Joy Tiz | Published: April 2, 2012
Is the Obama administration using either leaks or black propaganda to sabotage Israel’s defence against the threat of genocide?- Melanie Phillips, Daily Mail Online Evidently, reporters at the Daily Mail are not so caught up in the Trayvon ruckus that they’re ignoring the Obama administration’s most recent and most brazen efforts at sabotaging Israel’s efforts [...]
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Open Mic Night

By Joy Tiz | Published: March 26, 2012
Our president really can’t keep that cake hole of his shut.  To hell with decorum and security.  Last time, it was his belly aching about Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu to Sarko.  To date, Netanyahu has displayed too much dignity to respond to Obama’s adolescent whining. Obama has managed to get himself caught blabbing on an [...]
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Illinois, Illinois

By Joy Tiz | Published: March 21, 2012
By thy rivers gently flowing, Illinois, Illinois.  O’er they prairies verdant growing, Illinois, Illinois . . . or something like that.  In elementary school, we had to learn the Illinois state song.  Even more incredibly, we had to know the Star Spangled Banner and the Pledge of Allegiance before they were outlawed by liberals in [...]
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Democrats Lose the Phony War on Women

By Joy Tiz | Published: March 12, 2012
The president’s reelection prospects are looking so dim that Democrats have had to manufacture more pretend evil behavior by the Republicans. This time they’re spreading the news that the criminalization of contraception is a core plank of the Republican platform.  (How have we kept this secret for so long?)   Sure, it sounds crazy on its face [...]
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Valor Without Actors

By Joy Tiz | Published: February 27, 2012
From now on, any action adventure or war movie is going to feel like one of those cheap flimsy outfits made in China from one of the big box stores.  The flimsy thing is okay in its own way;  it may be entirely serviceable.  At least for awhile.  But what it lacks is substance and [...]
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Santorum Calls Out Obama’s Boss

By Joy Tiz | Published: February 21, 2012
Is the media really trying to convince us that someone other than Satan himself has taken over America?  It didn’t start with Obama, but we could at least begin to take our country back by being rid of Obama next election. So Santorum gives a speech in 2008 insulting Satan and that’s a problem?  A [...]
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Missiles? They Don’t Need No Stinkin Missiles!

By Joy Tiz | Published: February 20, 2012
I admit I was listening to Fox News with only half an ear while I was working this morning, but the anchorette grabbed my full attention when she asked her expert about Iran.  To paraphrase, she wanted to know in what act we may be in this Iran drama.  Are we just seeing previews? Huh? [...]
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Introducing the Food Security Administration

By Joy Tiz | Published: February 15, 2012
Be prepared for the White House to roll out its newest bureaucracy, the Food Security Administration (FSA).  The FSA will be responsible for monitoring school childrens’ lunches to ensure no contraband treats can be covertly brought into school lunchrooms. The plan is to set up a screening device which will be calibrated to sound an [...]
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Know When to Hold Him

By Joy Tiz | Published: February 14, 2012
Proving that not every politician who comes out of California is a complete lunatic, The Daily Caller is reporting that Republican Darrell Issa is pushing forward with his investigation of Eric Fast-n-Furious Holder. Despite the AGs office begging and pleading for more time to shred, er I mean, produce documents, Issa told the Department he [...]
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Barack Castro Deploys His Special Truth Teams

By Joy Tiz | Published: February 13, 2012
Team O is preparing to launch their deadly Truth Teams to go after American citizens who dare to criticize Barry Castro.  Didn’t we go through this last time when the O Team tried launching their ludicrous “Fight the Smears” campaign?  As I recall, that attempt at stifling free speech and turning citizens against each other [...]
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Winning Through Whining

By Joy Tiz | Published: January 30, 2012
It’s entirely un-Presidential to constantly complain about how the other candidates are always picking on you.  With the notable exception of Rick Santorum who has been known to grouse, correctly, about not getting enough attention at the debates. Newt is the wort offender by far with his endless bleating.  Oooooohhh, that mean Mitt Romney is running mean, [...]
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Brian’s Snooze Fest

By Joy Tiz | Published: January 24, 2012
What the hell was that last night?  At least I was able to skip my melatonin last night.  Somebody please fill me in on the last 30 minutes or so. Newt was hurt the most;  he needs to play to an audience.  NBC’s wildly overpaid anchor, Brian Williams led us into near catatonia by announcing at [...]
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Ricochet Revenge

By Joy Tiz | Published: January 23, 2012
On the Night Newt Won South Carolina (you’ll never forget where you where when you got the news on that one), the pundits were all atwitter about the female vote.  How, after all, could women possibly vote for Newt?  Were they not paying attention to all hard work done by the mainstream media to unearth [...]
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